Painting the Faces of Misery – Capturing Emotional Pain

Many years ago, I was shopping for groceries. My gut felt raw as I floated around the store in an “out-of-body” trance. I was going through a difficult divorce, and felt empty and forlorn.

There were no relatives nearby where I could seek comfort. I was completely alone. My heart was broken. A clerk, seeing only the superficial face I put forward remarked, “My god, can’t you at least smile?”

I must have looked pretty bad. My first thought was that he had no idea what I was going through. I was certainly in no condition to smile or talk. I tried to fake a smile, but it was impossible. I was in misery and I couldn’t hide it. His remarks had made me feel even worse.

My crooked smile, lopsided eyes, and fun-house features were simply revealing my inner emptiness and utter brokenness.

Later when I became an artist, I realized that you can’t paint misery and hurt unless you understand the underlying emotions that caused the pain in the first place.

For example, grief after a loved one’s death is different from the shattered grief of divorce. 

In a good marriage there are fond memories and the loss can be shared with friends and loved ones who knew well our partner or spouse. After a divorce, you don’t want to share the failure and the tragic details with anyone.

"Brokenhearted" 9 x 12 Pastel on Bristol; matted and ready to frame

Anger between loved ones is different from that between strangers or friends. The emotions cut deeper. The fragility of ego and insecurity add to the exploding feelings. There is often far more to lose. The relationship hangs by a thread unless you can get past anger’s unpredictable course. Forgiveness is almost mandatory. The anger with others is sometimes quickly forgotten. There is no intimacy or long-held expectations that stretch the ties that bind.

Try to create studies of people’s emotional reactions. Distinguish the simple breakdown between different kinds of anger and pain.

These subtle differences may slightly change the tilt of the mouth or a wrinkle in the nose. Emotions may be altered only by pushing one eyebrow upward to change an expression. Glassy eyes may add to the sadness. Body language and the way the hand is used to cover up what others see adds another dimension.

Practice will make these changes better over time. Be observant and find out what happens when slight movement gives your markings life and nuance. Your scenes will have more energy and drama; your story on canvas will become more dramatic, more interesting, and definitely more real.

"Serena Shines" Pastel on Bristol, matted

A person’s face is like a road map of the life they’ve lived and the things they’ve experienced. Once you have mastered unhappy faces, go on to those of joy and passion.

The decisions you make about “center of interest” must be made before you put one brush or pencil to canvas; where the face goes so goes the body. Every emotion portrayed must agree with the body language expressed.

"A Joyful Heart" 9 x 12 Patel on Bristol; matted and ready to frame

Ready to Shelve your Dreams and Give Up?

(Book cover illustration -- "Madison Morgan: When Dogs Blog, by Pam Torres)

Have you reached that point in your career where you're ready to put it all behind you? Perhaps your business hasn't taken off as you expected. You may be putting in the time without seeing results. The numbers may not be adding up. Your exposure hasn't brought the sales. It isn't that you're not working your tail off. It's that your emotional and physical stamina may be waning.

Don't give up just yet. This could be the lull before the storm when things begin to pick up. Or it may be that you have more to give than you think.

Examine your initial business plan. Is there something you can tweak? Are you putting in as much time to develop your business as you did in the beginning when you were full of enthusiasm? Is your lack of success a clue that your approach needs to be modified for a changing market?

(Illustration for "Madison Morgan")

Self-examination is imperative. Are you giving it all you've got or are you worn out? Do you simply need some motivation and inspiration? This is why sales conferences and group think were invented. Perhaps you need a "jolt out-of-the-blue" from an uninvolved mentor to take a look at what you can no longer see. Is there something you're missing? What could you do differently?

When we dig in our heels and refuse to seek help either from stubbornness or independence, we may lose the opportunity that could make all the difference. Even an honest appraisal, although brutal, may at least help us in the vital decision making.

There is no shame in defeat if you've done all you can to succeed. Chalk it up to experience and try again. Successful business owners fail many times before they finally succeed. A new product, a new partner, a new approach may provide the winning key that opens the door to success.

(Two mischievous boys get their comeuppance)

If you believe deeply in your own success, even discouragement will not deter your efforts. But if you're teetering on the brink of shelving everything you've worked for you definitely need an objective expert to either confirm or negate that opinion.

I heard the billionaire Mark Cuban say on Shark Tank that the most important component of a successful business was to love what you do. Without that driving force a business may crumble in on itself. But with a fiery passion eventually you're sure to succeed. Even if your first business fails, your vigorous efforts provide the needed steps for your next attempt. Effort and vision are never wasted.

(Back cover of "Madison Morgan")

Elbow Grease Puts a Shine on and Turns Your Worries into Profits

"Reggae Night" acrylic on canvas

Today was a very good day for me. I sold a vintage light fixture on my Etsy Shop Anfinsen Art, https://www.etsy.com/people/AnfinsenArt, and one of my paintings “Reggae Night” was given “SR” (Special Recognition) in an online contest that will be on display the entire month of March. If you’d like to see the categories and winners go to:

All Female Art Exhibition http://www.lightspacetime.com/all-women-painting-other/ this painting may be purchased at http://carol-allen-anfinsen.artistwebsites.com

(Vintage Tiffany-style chandelier)

We all need a little pat on the back now and then. Most of the time we put the hard work in and seldom see the payback. When we do it makes everything worthwhile.

I met a new artist this week. She is currently doing murals down in Key West. Her brother was working there, too, but plans on returning to the Caribbean. Mia showed me her work via her Smart Phone – Beautiful!

I shared an idea with her about incorporating jewels on a painting. I told her women in my art league discouraged the practice because then it would become more craft than painting.

Mia showed me a mermaid she had just created on a mural. Wherever the scales intersected on the tail, a small pearl accented the connection. Stunning! Her attitude is anything goes! I think that’s what I’m seeing out there also. If people kept doing the same things they were taught, soon all paintings would look alike and eventually be dull and boring. Daring to be different or to think outside the canvas is what Andy Warhol and Salvador Dali did and hundreds of other artists who were at first criticized and later embraced.

Keep pounding out the paintings people! Grind your tired fingers to the bone. Some day your efforts will be praised and purchased! Currently I’m working on one of my “boudoir” paintings. After all the work I’ve put into it I’m still not pleased. Seems too “static” for me; I prefer to have movement and action going on. I’m between painting over the canvas and doing something totally different with it.

"Sea Breeze" acrylic on canvas (The brush led me -- see the movement?)

Even though this decision has set me back a few weeks, I’m willing to live with it. When painting and creating (or whatever it is you do) becomes work, something is wrong! When the brush leads you, sparks are flying.

"Sea Swirls" acrylic on canvas (Notice the movement and 3-D scales?)

You may enjoy this music by “Jewel” about two painters who grow old together and are still painting:

What Motivates and Inspires You to Take Action?

What inspires you these days: A book or an author; a famous sports figure or an actor; a remarkable hero, a friend, an unusual painting?

Nature inspires me; the miracle of seed, growth, and transformation into something extraordinary, edible, nutritious or just plain beautiful. Whatever causes you to pause, to contemplate, or to turn your head may be the beginning of a great idea.

From the book “Transform: Dramatically Improve Your Career, Business, Relationships, and Life . . . One Simple Step at a Time," the author, Jeff Haden wrote: “In the dictionary ‘idea’ is a noun. Idea really should be a verb because an idea is not real until you turn your inspiration into action.”

How many opportunities have you missed because you failed to act on your ideas? Sometimes it boils down to laziness or an unwillingness to put in the needed effort.

(These seeds inspire me. The inside is exquisite!)

I heard Mark Cuban say on the CNBC show “Shark Tank,” “If you’re not willing to work 24/7 to build your business, you won’t make it.”

How motivated are you to succeed? What pushes your buttons? For some it’s money, pure and simple. For others it’s a need to feel important or to be involved in a cause bigger than themselves. Family is an important reason for many; the drive to keep the family afloat and to provide every opportunity for their children.

Self-fulfillment and satisfaction is a great motivator for a large segment of the population. Creating something out of nothing or turning a basic idea into something meaningful is just as important as any monetary gratification.

(I gather up a few of these each year, just so I can watch them open and unfold.)

In the March Better Homes and Gardens this quote caught my eye:  “Inspiration is everywhere – Add a touch of fabulous!”

Making your own life “fabulous” or someone else’s is pretty high on my list of perks. My husband gave me these lovely roses for Valentine’s Day. I love roses, especially red ones. I photographed them because I also love to paint them for practice. I don’t sell many paintings of roses, but painting them has given me experience in shading, shape, subtle changes in value and delicate brushwork. Roses inspire me to paint.

    

So do People. The landscape of the figure, the detail in the face and hands inspire me to improve my skill. Right now I’m juggling the differences between oil and acrylic and how dramatically their unique features demand color and application changes.

With acrylics, skin color goes on darker and the brush strokes bolder. With oils, it is possible to portray silky smoothness and seamless movement from one color to the next. I switched from oils to acrylics not by desire, but for health reasons. I’m never completely satisfied with the look of acrylic portraits. It’s an acquired taste, and an expert development of skill that makes all the difference.

(This painting has an acrylic underpainting and was finished in oils.)

You can achieve an almost oil-like appearance with acrylics, but it requires many layers of paint to achieve. Patience is the key. Once you have reached the look you desire, leave that area and go onto the next. Overworking can ruin that just put-down freshness that enlivens a canvas.

(This painting was done in acrylics. The smooth skin is a result of subtle color changes and layering.)

Passion defines those who are inspired and those who are not. Don’t paint something just because you know you can do it. Pour into your paintings only those scenes or images that you are passionate about. Because you love what you are doing, others will fall in love with the result. 

Life is like that, too. Fall in love with your life by being passionate about what you do. If the people you are around drag you down and make you sad – choose different friends. Don’t get involved in causes that are nothing more than “busy work.”  Without the passion and the drive, you’ll end up feeling overworked and frustrated. Love what you do, and do what you love!

(I would love to paint this half-opened bud!)

Make your Voice Heard -- Vote your Conscience!

"Looking Outward" 16x20 acrylic canvas; Old window frame, painting on glass = 3-D experience!

“It’s all about perception.”  This statement has become a political strategy. The meaning is clear: “It doesn’t matter who you are or what you stand for; what matters is what other people think you stand for and how you are perceived.”

In other words, if you can pull the wool over people’s eyes some of the time, you may just fool them into voting for you. After the election, all bets are off!

Unfortunately, this has become the norm in politics making our decisions at the polls more difficult than they have ever been before. Politicians say one thing and do another. There is inconsistency between their behavior and their words; but there’s one little secret they won’t tell you. If you examine their record, you can see exactly how they vote in Congress, what legislation they support and whom they side with. Those are the facts they can’t hide from.

Perception colors our choices and our responses to other people. The words people use to communicate are linked to past experiences. Two people may use the same word, but have an entirely different meaning attached to it. Relationships, environment, and family influence determine how we see the world and how we communicate with each other.

"Sea Swirls" acrylic drawing, work-in-progress (3rd in my Seaside Series)

The best way to illustrate the power of perception is taken from a familiar story by John Maxwell in  Developing the Leader Within You.

“After World War II, a general and his young lieutenant boarded a train in England. The only seats left were across from a beautiful young lady and her grandmother. The general and the lieutenant sat facing the women. As the train pulled out, it went through a long tunnel.

"For about ten seconds, there was total darkness. In the silence of the moment, those on the train heard two things — a kiss and a slap. Everyone on the train had his or her own perception of what happened.

“The young lady thought to herself, I’m flattered that the lieutenant kissed me, but I’m terribly embarrassed that Grandmother hit him!

“The Grandmother thought, I’m aggravated that the young man kissed my granddaughter, but I’m proud she had the courage to retaliate!

“The general sat there, thinking to himself, My lieutenant showed a lot of guts in kissing that girl, but why did she slap me by mistake?

“The lieutenant was the only one on the train who knew what really happened. In that brief moment of darkness, he had the opportunity to kiss a pretty girl and slap his general.”

"Sea Swirls" acrylic on canvas; 2nd work-in-progress (It's all about layering)

Another interesting story comes from http://Sulekha.com (Delhi)

“One day a man opened the garage door, which startled a large butterfly. It flew immediately to its perceived escape, the circle-topped window where it frantically tried to exit through the invisible wall of closed glass.

“The man raised the third-car garage door in hopes of aiding its escape. This caused the butterfly to fly higher and higher and become entangled in a spider web.

“Fearful that it would remain entangled in the web, the man selected a long-handled broom to assist him escaping the tangled threads.

 “At this, the butterfly returned to furiously pumping his wings and banging into the glass, which was, in his perspective, the pathway of escape, but remained his cage.

Success Principle

 “By simply turning his focus to one side, the butterfly would have easily exited his prison. Rather, due to his intent on one direction, he remained confined, captive.

“Every day in our lives we focus on one side of the problem, not looking at it from others points of view. If there is any one secret of success, it lies in the ability to get the other person's point of view and see things from that person's angle as well as from your own.”

This is true in life and in many other endeavors at work or at play. When we create we never know how our work is perceived? People view it from the vantage point of their own experience. What may seem beautiful or interesting to the artist may trigger something entirely different in someone else.

"Sea Breeze" acrylic on 30x24 canvas; First in my Seaside Series

This is why juried competition is often frustrating on many levels. The judges see the canvas from his or her past learning experiences and their personal expertise and vision. The artist creates from his own internal perceptions. Each has a different perspective on what they see. A determination is made, but it is more subjective than objective. 

The best an artist can do is to keep painting from his or her own passion and life experiences until others share the joy and excitement the artist felt at creation.

Beyond the Highways and Byways – a Journey of Heart and Soul

"Arabesque" oil on canvas

The above canvas was painted from a pond near my home. The birds were those I see fluttering in and out almost every day; the great egrets and the snowy egrets. Herons come frequently as do anhinga and the little blues (small herons); but I wanted white birds against the dark water.

When someone told me that my work reminded them of the Highwaymen of early Florida, I thought it was a backhanded insult. The Highwaymen were unschooled black people who taught themselves to paint and then sold their wares on the cheap to tourists driving along the roadways and trails.

 For the most part, I was a self-taught artist much like them. Finally, their work has gained the recognition it deserves. According to their web site, “The Florida Highwaymen Artists” were the start of Florida's contemporary art tradition, and are credited for the beginning of the "Indian River School" art movement.

“They developed their own individual techniques and captured waterscapes, back country marshes, and inlets the way they once were before recent tourism developments.

“From the beginning, there were people who collected Florida Highwaymen art and paintings. However only in recent years has the recognition of their skill and their story caused their paintings to skyrocket in value.  In 2004, twenty-six individuals were inducted into the Florida Artists Hall of Fame as "Florida Highwaymen."

To read their names go to this link:  http://www.floridahighwaymenpaintings.com/highwaymen_artists

Artists who work hard for their degrees and accolades often resent the success of those who are less educated than they . The work of self-taught artists as they struggle to improve their skill through error and practice is sometimes looked upon with a critical eye and disdain. Like the highwaymen of the past, these artists may not have the funds or wherewithal for supplies let alone education.

I became acquainted with an African artist who asked if I could purchase some brushes and send them to him. He had been painting on brown paper bags for lack of a canvas. Some use wood from nearby palm trees or they paint on shells or other natural surfaces from their environment.

Painters in Iraq and other war torn countries face the same difficulties. Yet their artwork is vibrant, sometimes shocking, and unquestionably moving. When will we mature enough as artists to recognize that art is communication? It represents who we are, what we feel and what we have experienced.

Art can teach us about other people in a way that words cannot. Whether it’s the beauty we see that we wish to share, or the pain and anguish of a broken world, or the loss of a loved one. 

How we experience art tells us a lot about ourselves. Do we recognize beauty for what it is or does our critical eye keep us from hearing the message? Are we able to see beyond cultural barriers into the soul of another? Do our prejudices produce a wall instead of a door? Do we see the “thorn on the rose” rather than the bloom?

"Window on Pine Island" Oil on wrapped canvas.

Are you a Girl Scout – always Prepared? Are you ready to Live a Little?

I had a surgical procedure recently which made it difficult to get my blog out on time. I hate when that happens! The only thing a person can do is to go with the flow and hope for the best.

while I convalesce, I’ve been doing more reading. Old treasures lodged in my bookcase dusty and forgotten. One of my favorites is a small book of stories and poems edited by Sandra Halderman Martz called “If I had my life to live over... purchased along with another winner “When I am an old woman I shall wear purple” also edited by Martz.

Usually found in artsy gift shops, these books are a delight to read and ponder. Nadine Stair wrote the forward for the first book. Her good advice inspired me:

"Tickles from God" acrylic on canvas

“If I had my life to live over, I’d dare to make more mistakes next time. I’d relax, I would limber up. I would be sillier than I have been this trip. I would take fewer things seriously. I would take more chances. I would climb more mountains and swim more rivers. I would eat more ice cream and less beans. I would perhaps have more actual troubles, but I’d have fewer imaginary ones. . .  If I had my life to live over, I would start barefoot earlier in the spring and stay that way later in the fall. I would go to more dances. I would ride more merry-go-rounds. I would pick more daisies.”

From the same book, Barbara L. Thomas penned a lovely poem called “A Weaver”

“Once
contemplated
   a disturbing
       fray
before
choosing the

 way
the pattern
    should continue
            She
    taught
the shuttle

 symmetry
and rose from
    the loom

            clothed in
 beauty of her
own

fashioning

The poem is not only artfully constructed it captures the inner soul of the weaver and her thought process as she places thread over thread in a colorful expression of her passion.

Artists inspire and encourage one another. Yes, we’re in competition, but we can also appreciate what is different from our own personal style. For instance, when I buy jewelry, I prefer to buy from an artist rather than a retail store. The jewelry is unique and I usually find something unusual that becomes a conversation piece.

For my birthday this year, my daughter and her husband gave me a beautiful necklace from Carrie’s Creations on Etsy. A family tree is surrounded by six circles each representing one of my children. The bright blue stones are eye popping next to the black wiring.

Another daughter gave me a long leather beaded bracelet that wraps the arm and fastens in place. Of course, I had to buy an outfit that would set both of them off. Amazing things happen when you have the jewelry in hand first and then search for an outfit to compliment the whole ensemble. I chose a white "Hot Cotton" two-piece outfit with earthy colors.

I rarely purchase art prints from someone else (I have enough of my own). I do advertise other artist’s work on my blog, however, and enjoy touting the successful artists that are out there by linking to their web sites. Inviting other artists to do a guest blog is another way to share the limelight and help your followers and fellow bloggers at the same time.

What do Artistic People create and why do they do it?

"Home at Last" 16 x 20 acrylic on canvas

As an artist, I’ve thought a lot about that question. What is it that makes me create and why do I do it? Perhaps my answers will also be yours:

An artist wants to share what touches him or her visually and emotionally, and may find it difficult to impart these feelings in any other way.

Artists have a driving passion to put down on paper or canvas the experiences in their hearts and souls that would either cause them to explode in joyful ecstasy or painful agony if not expressed. Artists and writers often share these same passions, but articulate them through different mediums.

We all have a need for intimacy, some people more than others. When someone views an artist’s work it is like inviting them to share an intimate moment of our personality and perspective on life.

"First Daffodil" 16 x 20 acrylic on canvas; model Kayla Dahm

An artist may create a mini-story, a glimpse into the human soul, a taste of the human condition, or they may take us on a wonderful adventure either through realism or exciting plains of color and movement.

The viewer may virtually walk the terrain of uncharted territory, explore the shape and form of facial structure, and fathom in a new way the miracle of life, the struggle of humanity, or the joy of rebirth.

By altering line, angle and space through color, light and shadow, an artist controls the mood and mind of the viewer and leads them on an intimate journey around the canvas and back again to the focal point or center of interest.

Viewers are rarely aware of the invisible companion who leads them from one point to another as the story unfolds. When the onlooker experiences pleasure, happiness, or darkness the artist has done his or her job.

“So this is what old age brings?” an observer may comment on seeing an unfulfilled wastrel lamenting over his fateful actions.

"Reggae Night" acrylic on canvas

“That’s exactly how I felt when I was dancing,” says another, as they sway in their mind and remember the cadence of drums, sand, and the smells and sounds of the Caribbean. As an artist, you brushed this scene onto canvas using your own fond memories where they lingered playfully in your mind waiting for you to give them the breath of life.

Fulfillment happens when the artwork is finished not when it’s viewed, commented on, or sold. As artists we rarely get to see or know the experience of the viewer, or whether they perceived our art in the same way as we created it. 

Once we have “put it all out there,” we have done our part. The rest is up to chance, fate, or destiny. For some of us, it is a blessing from God for which we are eternally grateful and joyful.

"Blending In" 11 x 14 acrylic on panel (The feathers replicate the petals, which is how I
saw this scene and painted it.)

We learn from our Mistakes, even when we repeat them

"Flash Dance" was not juried in, but continues to be one of my favorites!

I don’t know about you, but I get frustrated with myself. I seem to learn everything the hard way. “Why can’t you do it right, the first time,” I chide myself. “Why does it have to be so doggone hard?”

Not until I’ve done something more than a few times do I get the hang of it. I’m left handed by nature and birth, but was forced into using my right hand. My brain never adjusted. I have frequent bouts throughout the day where I reverse things during the thought process. I know I’m supposed to turn on the right front burner of the stove, but when I’m finished with the action, the back left burner is turning hot.

It happens more than I care to mention. I’ve been known to try to go down an up escalator, especially under stress, and reverse numbers or text in my head when I’m working on a newsletter. Luckily the errors are glaring when I print out a proof copy.

"The Perfect Ending" was not juried in, but continues to be popular online.

And why is it so easy to overlook a composition fluke or the way an object overlaps and turns to create shadow? Because artwork is really about teaching people how to see, including me. Some people are more detailed than others. There are not only intellectual choices to be made, but intuitive ones that come from experience.

Beginning artists should not give up because the learning curve is long. Over time, you will master the techniques and foundational skills that make the difference between novice and professional. Even seasoned artists make mistakes. But they have weathered the storms of criticism and error. They have found ways to accommodate mistakes and have discovered dynamic artistic surprises in the process.

When the confluence of color and line diverge in ways to capture the viewer’s attention and lead them through pathways you’ve created, exciting things happen. Energy, emotion, and pure delight emerge and create sensations that effect lasting impressions. This is the mark of perfection and success.

"Home at Last" was not juried in because they didn't like the frame.

Remember, if you’re not excited by your creation, it isn’t likely anyone else will be, either. On the other hand, if you are able to harness your passion and express it on canvas, others will feel it, too, and be drawn to the vibrancy of your vision.

Don’t worry about the canvases that go unsold, or the ones you may paint over. It’s all part of the experience. Nothing needs to go to waste. Watercolorists often cut out small portions of a ruined painting and frame petite ones that sell well on the market.

I've had a few paintings rejected in juried competition that later sold. I continue to sell prints from the originals. It’s all in the “eye of the beholder.” If you feel strongly about what you’re doing, eventually other people will feel it and become buyers.

"The Pose" a barred owl on my daughter's porch. (Acrylic on canvas)